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Palms to Sockets

from Desultory by Count Vesper

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lyrics

I climbed up to the roof and nearly slept
the bite of winter in my chest
so content

the wishful breeze tracing violet skin
sure there’s some sweet magic there
but none that i can claim

it’s like i feel your pulsing from across the sky
it might be real this time

i’m rarely so damn tired, please no take it back,
sleeps never been to kind

in claustrophobic cryonic dreams i begin to reach things that he has lived and so has she
they’ve all got it on me

i’m lying to a blind man and his dog
seems they’ll never care that much
so why bring it up

wish i could be so crass so nonchalant
think i’m some sick altruist chewing toxic chalk

but is all of that care and love a ruse?
quite sure i like me more than you

think i’ve over thought this please no take it back
there’s no more left to chew

as the poison cuts into me i begin to face things that he can’t see and she can’t flee
they’ve all got nothing on me


sleep is an abyss, i spin and plummet down
but waking up as this is a horror in itself

and in the end i’ll look at what i’ve done
palms to sockets, not again
it wasn’t even fun

i’m a silver ember and you’re a smoke filled room
my glow barely cuts through you

i dare not think i’m handsome no i’m clearly meant to smother under it

you could tend to my flame but why do that
from across the room i’m
a soul sucking vampire bat
i think i’m finally dying
my blood is silver cold
ive never slept quite right
and always been too old

credits

from Desultory, released August 22, 2021

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Count Vesper Bellingham, Washington

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